Wednesday, September 3, 2008

My Dad... Douglas Lee Barber





I made it a year. I can hardly believe it. A year ago Sept 4th I lost my very special Dad. I made it through all the "firsts". Birthdays, Anniversaries, etc. I am so glad that he is no longer suffering. He never wanted to put anyone out, I loved helping him the last few months. He had to have a tube inserted into his throat so he could be hooked up to a machine to help him breathe. When he first came home from the hospital we kids took turns helping get him "hooked up". I was first and ended up staying the night at his house for a few nights. He was so nervous and I was now responsible for his life. I miss him so much. I really think he knew the end was near. He got my mom all settled in her new house and then just 4 days after we moved them he went into the hospital. I thought he would do as he had in the past and get well in a few weeks and come home. He was in the hospital 4 days before he passed away. My Uncle Keith was with him and my mom at the time and I am forever grateful to him for being there for my parents. I have had the hardest time the last few weeks. Because I know he would have loved the weather, parties, and seeing his grand kids grow and become great little people. I know that in my worst times he is with me. I just wish I could have one more time to sit and chat with him like we did in his room at night when I would go to his house and help get him hooked up to his breathing machine for the night. We would just chat about the day. We had no interruptions from the phone or kids. I have had great support from Trent. He is the best. He lets me be a cry baby when needed. My most memorable moment of my Dad is when he would hold my arm and say "Thank you, love you Cutie" I miss his voice. I made my family photos of them with my dad and the saying "I've learned that I may forget what you said, I may forget what you did, but I will never forget how you made me feel." I cant wait to see him again, healthy and happy.

7 comments:

Shantelle said...

This looks great. Have a good day! I am so grateful for the picture you had put together of each of us with Dad. I will forever be grateful for your confidence in caring for Dad, If I was ever nervouse you were there to help. THANKS

The Beardall's said...

You are very welcome for the photos. I was glad they turned out so well. I dont know where my confidence came from with dad. Maybe it was that he needed us and he had been so great to all of us for so long without question.

Lindy said...

That was a great tribute to your dad. And yes, I cried, but that was never an issue right. It is always best to think that he is in a better place and not suffering anymore and that is always with you and is still watching Brock, Brin and Bridge grow up.

Jackie said...

Kathleen,
You made me cry when you said "I miss his voice". I am so sorry for your loss. It sounds like he was an amazing man and that you had an incredible relationship. We have had a similar year. I lost my dad a year ago in August, so know what you mean when you say a year of 'firsts'.

I wish you the best!

The Marvelous Mrs. Miller said...

What a loving tribute to your dad.
You have some wonderful cherished memories.

Angie said...

I can't believe that the year has passed. I know that I have always had a special connection to your baby brother, but you & the rest of the family were so kind to me as well. I remember times with your parents & talks that we had. Your father was one of a kind & I will always be greatful to have known him.

The Beardall's said...

Thank you all for your nice comments. I like to hear what a great guy my dad was. I have always thought he was pretty neat, but that is the only bright spot in losing him is to hear how great he was to others.